Thank you Jesus for another day. I know so many things have happened and I know that not all has been that good. I thank you that you have always been there and your presence never left me. The Holy Spirit was right by my side through all the good and bad times. I got some days off for the Easter Break but ever since then I had work and it was intensely busy. Every day I had like 10 minutes for lunch. I mean I'm glad I'm busy but I was just really tired and drained out by everything. Well today wasn't a good day for my little sis at all. No matter what she does wrong, I will never love her less. I love her so much and care about her more than everything in this world, besides God and my mum. She's going through a rough patch of teenage years. Her phone bills have been overloaded. I didn't tell mum about her mobile bill because I didn't want mum to get upset. But nonetheless, she was very upset already. We confiscated the laptop from her after finding out that she hasn't been completing her theory work from tutoring especially when mum pays so much for it. It's literally 2 full days of work to pay off for her 4 hours classes per week. That's really a lot of money. She's probably been doing something she shouldn't be, that's why she also blocked me on facebook. She blocked my big sister too apparently and also Cong. Some of the pictures are not something I want to see my sister do and the words she speaks publicly aren't things I want to hear coming out of her mouth. I'm a little disappointed but at the same time I'm thankful that God has his hands over her, and that He has an amazing plan for her life. I love Jesus and I love how merciful he is. He is able to take our mess and turn it into a message. I know everyone of us goes through a rough patch during this time. Like myself, I did too, even though I believed in God, I was kind of acting differently towards my parents, sisters and so on. I remember me chatting to guys as well, and getting excited because you get the attention. I know at that age I was stubborn and stupid, not knowing a whole lot. But I'm glad I have finally grown out of it and I know my sister will too. I mean look at my big sister, she wasn't considered a 'good' kid when she was 16 but now she's quite established and is expecting her first baby boy! That is really exciting. So all I can say is that, I thank Jesus for loving us and allowing us to make mistakes and learn from them.. hopefully!
I pray for my little sister that she will receive not only discernment but also the will to do what is right. I know how difficult it may be to do what's considered the norm with her friends, but I sincerely hope that she will be wise enough to choose the narrow road that few chooses. I know where she will be, and she will be with you. She is a little distant from you at the moment so I ask that you will draw closer to her and speak into her heart. Please allow her to do things out of love not of pressure and obligation. I have a lot of hope in her. I know without a doubt that she will be so successful and she will do so well in her schoolings. I love her dearly and I KNOW You Jesus have a great plan for her life.
So right now, she has no laptop, and we also took away her phone. She's sad but this has to be done. Jesus, you discipline those you love and we're just doing the same. We want her to be well behaved and well brought up in this family. I know tonight, right at this moment beside me, she's probably crying...very silently. And I'm hoping those are the tears of repentant, not of angry, but of realisation! She usually listens to music when she falls asleep but this night will be different. I know she's not used to it. She's tossing and turning...
I want to cherish every moment I have with her because I love her so dearly. Even when she hurts me but walking away or raising her voice or disrespecting me, I still love her. Yet still, I love her even more because I know my God is faithful and she will not be like this forever. For those who have been forgiven much, they will love much. Even though she's doing many wrong things, but I know eventually she will give in and look to God for forgiveness, and when she knows she is forgiven, she will love much because God's blood was shed for her, for her many many sinful deeds.
Last night was CG. It was the 2nd one of this year and the 1st since Leighton got back from his trip. It was good in that it made me think about my revelation. I looked back and realised how sometimes we can miss out target and go astray. I know I should be focusing onto the Father's will. Sometime I doubt if those things will ever happen but I know they were the words of God. I mean seriously, me preach?! For real????? And the funny things is that Theresa also told me at CG that she thinks I should consider preaching. I'm so young right now. I'm only 20 and God already told me about the future; where I will meet my partner, why I'm doing hairdressing, how my sister will turn back to God; how my mum will be saved ect...
Those are amazing things that God spoke of. He gave me visions and I know he will provide the provisions. It makes me think of Joseph and how it took so long for the revelation of God to come about. It made me think of Noah and how God told him to do things that didn't make sense at that time, but made sense after. I wonder if I will come to that point where I doubt and be like " Why am I doing this? Will I really be what God wants me to be?". To be honest I'm a little nervous about Him telling me that I will change 'nations & the world'. I mean, 'WOW' reallyyyy??? How?????
Well I can't predict the future. I just have to trust in God's timing and live life on a daily basis. Please teach me more O God and let my life be full of the fruits of the Spirit so that when others see me, they will see you Jesus. Please fill me, make me full of your goodness. Take away my love for food but satisfy me with what only You can give, which is love & peace. Help me to be more for you and I pray you will help me at work as well. I hope to hit my target this week and I pray you will allow me to accomplish that. I know I will!! :) I pray that I will get high client retention rate, I hope they come back. I just want to really build a strong clientèle. I know you love me and I don't have to worry a thing! :)
I love you Jesus!!
