Lord,
I think about all these people that I look up to, or wanting to be like...and all I feel is that, as much as I think they have it all-together, they don't. I know they don't. I'm thinking of these 2 particular girls that I really admire. But both of them don't follow you. One has the look, I mean she is absolutely STUNNING and I sometime wished I could look like her. The other girl, she has to look too, but I admire her more for her talents: her academic skills, her passion for what she loves, how she is so strong-willed and is not afraid to be different. She is also very popular but that isn't something I'm looking for anyway. At times, I don't know if I think about what I 'don't' have too much. I should be thinking more of who I am LIVING FOR, and what pleases God, instead of hoping to get things to please others. I don't want to live to please other people and not you. I want to love them and do what you would want for me to do. I have been going through a rough patch with self-image, but when I think about such issue, I've come to realisation that this body of mine will perish, and that God will give me a new one once I depart this place to enter into my new home. I long for that day, the day of perfection & glory and eternal life. I think about how nothing in this life matters anymore because ultimately, it is all because of Him. Everything we do, it is all for Him. I want to give it all for my Father in heaven. The Holy Spirit spoke to me of start saving up my tips money for God. So from now on I will put all of my tips money in a money box, and I will open it next year or something when it is full (or maybe leading up to the Heart-for-the-House offering) I believe it will be a big blessing to others. I thought about how these tips money could possibly give me a large sum of money, and that I can spend it on shopping or travelling ect, however, my heart is for God, and I am living for Him, so I decide to give him thanks by doing this. If it wasn't for Him, I would not be able to receive any of these blessings. Besides, He can use 20 cent, 50 cent, $1 way more creative & useful than I could ever spend it. He can use it to build his eternal kingdom. He can use that to leave a lasting impact in people's lives. Whereas if I was to spend it, the things I purchase will rot away because they are 'things', they are pretty much 'worthless' expensive things.
This Easter season has been amazing....
So What does Easter mean to me?
Easter to me, is much more than a long weekend. Easter is much more than chocolate eggs & bunnies. It is more than just taking a break from work, hanging out with friends, and relaxing. Easter, I believe is one of two important thing in a year. Christmas marks the birth of Jesus, and Easter marks the resurrection of Christ himself. Easter is the gospel itself. It is the reason for our faith. It is the reason for our forgiveness. It is the perfect demonstration of God's love for humanity, for YOU and ME. For everyone on this earth, those who were here and those that will be here. Everytime I think of Jesus, I literally stop breathing because I can't fathom how much he loves us. I don't know how a perfect being can go through such tragedy because He cared so much for me. He loved us so much that He died so that we won't have to spend eternity in Hell, but be saved by grace to be in Heaven with Him. Jesus is so amazing, and he is the perfect sacrifice. I loved the service on Easter Friday and I loved today's service for Easter Sunday: the day he rises. The whole service was amazing, that's all I can say. I loved the worshipping and the talk. I loved how the whole idea of anchor was brought up. It made me think about what I put my trust and my hope towards, and that sometimes we can be passive and THINK that God is our anchor YET still worry about certain situations, trusting in ourselves to make things work, trusting in finance, in jobs, in people, in other's approvals ect. And it should not be like that because these change!! But God doesn't. He never changes, he is the same forever and he is eternal. I chose to put my trust in Him because it is HIM in me that is greater than anything on this earth. He made it, so how can I trust the things that he made, instead of trusting in the creator of those things. Surely the inventor would know better.
Jesus is really awesome.
I will wait Lord, for as long as you want me to. As hard as it may be, I'm living for you and I know this life is not all there is. This life is temporary but my life with you is eternal. That's forever, never ending, never stopping. A place of your love, where light shines always, where there is no glimpse of shadows because light shines from all directions. It is where the trees, the grass sings for you. Everything is alive and we worship you. We love you Jesus. I know it will be hard for me but I will wait for that man you're preparing for me. I will wait. I will wait. Because I know you will provide the best for me if I wait.
Thank you Jesus..
xx
