So I haven't written anything here in a very long time. Mainly because I don't access to the computer much and so I forgot to make a note here. However, my note books have been filled up consistently. It is the 2nd of September today, it is Father's Day and also my little sister's birthday. I have to remember to go get her a cake. I didn't get her a birthday present. I don't know what to get her... but I think I still need to get her something for her sweet 16.
How's life lately for me? Work has been okay. My boss just came back from his trip in Toronto. It's been so quite, but was busy yesterday for the first time in a long time. I'm thinking of leaving soon and pursue what God has installed for me. I'm not exactly sure on what God is wanting to do through me but I know I'm preparing myself for a new season.
Afterparty is going okay. The attendance has decreased quite a lot but I think it's due to the weather. It's just too cold. Although, it doesn't really matter about the amount of people we get, because only Jesus brings people. I think as long as I am faithful with what he has given me then that's all that matters. I'm blessed to have such amazing people around but praying that he will equip them and myself to do more for him.
My connect group is going well too. I'm glad I have to go through the journey, we're getting more consistent with our attendance now but I still need spend more quality times with people. It's hard when I have work and other commitments with serving and planning for church. I'm quite excited to dedicate more of my time for Jesus.
So at the end of the year, I've already booked a cruise to Queensland for 10 days. It will be amazing. I'm very excited because I've never been on a cruise before.
I've been eating very healthily as well. It's the 13th day possibly. I've been extremely good compare to other times. I think the last time I was this strict with my eating was 3 years ago. I hope it can be consistent. I've been experiencing self esteem and weight issue as long as I could remember and I've never been entirely happy with how I am. I'm hoping this year will be different. I know it takes hard work and that's why I'm willing to do it. I'm so thankful that God brought back my love for fitness and health. The other night at church I put in a praise report and said how I was thankful for Jesus, for giving me back my love for fitness and Nathan Miller read it out to the church. I just couldn't stop giggling on the inside because no one knows that it was me! I'm really thankful for Jesus for giving me the momentum. Thank you Jesus so much. I'm really hoping I will look the way I've been hoping in a long time. I know that physical appearance is not the most important thing but as a physical being we need to look after what God has put in our control. I thank God everyday for his provision.
I want to look back to this year and at least be happy for some things that I've set out as my new year resolution. One of the things I've always wanted to do was Salsa dancing. I've always wanted to try it out for so long now!! Although I didn't try that, I did try the Samba workshop last week at Latin Dance Australia, and it was a lot of fun. I'm really hoping to pursue that but it's so hard to find a class that doesn't overlap my working hours or connect group.
Apart of me still feel as though Jesus is urging me to learn Italian. He's been speaking to me since last year after my Europe trip, but I don't see any possible way of learning it. It's even harder not knowing why I have to learn it when he wants to take me to Paris.
I'm really hoping to go Paris next year. But where will I get the money. What will I do there. What job will I take after the come back from the trip.... I really need Jesus to take care of me.
Another thing is ...... It's hard to say. But there's someone that I liked/like, and not sure if it's right to like that person. It's just sad knowing that they don't know that you like them. What's even sadder is that I'm a traditional girl and doesn't initiate or approach. I believe the man will pursue you otherwise it is not mutual. Sometimes I wonder how long I have to wait and if Jesus says I will meet someone when I'm overseas then when will that me. That means I will not meet someone till next year or even the time after that. Yet I know whether or not we have someone, we still need to be happy with ourselves, single or attached.
I was watching a video on youtube today all about allowing that perfect man to find you etc.. and it comforted me a little. It wouldn't bother me as much if I did not like anyone, but if I do find interest in someone it's hard to forget about it and think that he's not the one. Maybe I just have to accept that fact. Probably he is not the one.
Maybe God is telling me that I still need to take care of myself. There are still issues with myself that I need to deal with.
1. A man in the presence of God
2. A man who has a job
3. A man who inspires you, protect you, cover you, nurture you.
How long do I have to wait...
